If you can read this you are one of the lucky ones who can access my site. I can’t even get to it. I had to go to the admin directly to add this post. When I type in my url and hit enter I can see my site then automatically get redirected to another site. The warning comes up for a sec saying “this site has a poor reputation”. Fucker! I can’t even choose to ignore the warning. Fucker! When I get to LA I have someone who can look at it and then hopefully I can resume posting again. Cause I feel much better and have lots to say.

Yes I am going to be in LA from the 5th to the 9th. I’m staying in Hollywood and if you would like to meet me please email me at alixlakehurst@gmail.com or alix@wecouldbenaked.com. Do it soon cause I’m booking up fast. After LA I will be in Monterrey for a few days then San Francisco then back in Monterrey. If you want to see me there let me know.

Yes I started doing THAT! Don’t judge! Everyone likes sex and everyone needs it. I’m having a ball and don’t understand why I was so afraid.

I should be back on the 22nd of February, just in time for my birthday on the 25th. If I can I may run back to LA for another few days.

I have plans to shoot with Gram Ponante. I love him and can’t wait. I am also planning on seeing Ron Jeremy. I didn’t contact Christy Canyon cause I’m shy. Yes I’m a dork. Whatever! She’s busy with her life. I might get the courage when I’m there. I hope its not when I’m drunk.

Ok so you got the info. Hope to see you if you fans in LA!

I read an interesting article about the rise of vagina insecurity. You can read it here. The article talks about how women are getting surgery to make their vagina’s look better. Weird. Aren’t all vagina’s really cool looking no matter what? I think so. Some of the procedures mentioned are:

“Labiaplasty/labioplasty (labia minora reductions), labia majora ‘augmentations’ (tissue removal, fat injections), liposuction (mons pubis, labia majora), vaginal tightening (fat injections, surgical tightening), clitoral hood reductions, clitoral repositioning, G-spot ‘amplification’ (collagen injected into the G-spot, which swells it significantly), and hymen reconstruction (to restore the appearance of ‘virginity’).

According to doctors in the article, women do this for a better looking vagina. I don’t understand this. If you are going to be a porn star that’s one thing and its somewhat understandable. But if a woman never plans on having her pussy professionally photographed whats the big deal? Is her significant other that much of an asshole? I have never heard any male ever talk negatively about the look of a pussy. I’ve heard talk about smell, and one fucker even published it in a book. (I liked the book I didn’t like him-”Boo hoo I’m a mess and a drug addict. I have to do porn cause I need money. By the way, this girl’s pussy stank.” Fuck you loser!)

We women have enough to worry about with films and television primarily focusing on hot, thin and young women. For the last few months, I have been reading about how the ideal size in Hollywood is below a 4 and most actresses don’t eat so they can fit in the sample sizes designers let them borrow for award shows and parties. You know what happens when I don’t eat? My stomach growls and begs me for food. I get awful headaches and stomachaches that put me into a nasty mood making me an asshole.  It’s not worth it. If I starved myself to lose weight, I would only binge afterward and gain it all back.

I digress, this post is about vagina’s. When I was younger I didn’t like mine either. It looked nothing like the ones in Playboy or Penthouse. This is before I knew what airbrushing was. As I got older and grew hair, I started to like it more because it felt good when I touched it. I also couldn’t see it as well, being Greek means lots of pubic hair.

When I started having sex I wondered why I didn’t come as hard as I did when I masturbated. During college, I took woman’s study classes and realized that I had a hooded clit. I read that you could get the hood reduced to increase sensitivity and asked my doctors about it. They just told me to practice and try new things because that kind of surgery wasn’t covered by insurance and it was most likely not necessary.

I started shaving my pussy bald about 8 years ago. This increased my sensitivity tenfold and I really enjoyed sex. Since then I haven’t gone more than two months without shaving. Many people request that I grow out my bush and take pictures. I agree that a bush is hot but I prefer no hair. It’s better for me.

I just don’t understand this vagina insecurity. I love mine and every guy I’ve been with loves it too. I’m sure the blame will fall on the porn industry and that’s sad. We take extra measures to insure that our cunts look good in photographs. This is what we do. None of us want a woman to see our pussies and feel bad about their own. And there is no pussy standard in the porn world. Pretty much if you show it it will be worshiped.

Like most women when I look in the mirror I see something different than other people. I’m sure that is what is happening to these vagina insecure women. They need to understand this, but I’m not going to be responsible for that.

I urge you to always respect and love the vagina as if it were a goddess. Always tell the woman it is beautiful and smells like roses. I promise you will get laid much more often.

This weekend I finally watched Saw I, II and part of III. I went to see Zombieland during III and caught the very end when I got home. They weren’t as scary as I thought they would be. I like gore but I never want it to be too realistic. I think the part that bothered me the most was the wife and daughter screaming when they were being held by Ben from Lost. He’s a scary guy anyway and if he held me hostage I would scream too.

It was fun to watch Westley saw off his leg. The only thing close to that in the second film was the guy cutting off a piece (perfect square?) of his neck to see his number. I also liked all the traps that cut people up. I do think that Shawnee Smith falling into all those needles was cool but a rip-off from Susperia. (Any excuse to link to that scene and this one. Yes I’m a bit obsessed, the wallpaper gets me every time.)

Here are the problems I have with Saw: “Lets play a game”, “I have a new game for you”, “There is one more game”, “One last game”, “Wait, you have to play yet another game”. “It’s a test”, “Pass this test and you will be free”, “Wait you passed that test? I have one more test for you”, “Opps sorry, I lied, there’s one final test”. “You need to care about me”, “No, you need to care about her”, “It’s about caring for her and not me”, “It was about caring for me, haha”. “You need me alive,” You need her alive”, “You really needed me alive, haha”.

Ok, those aren’t direct quotes but what was going on in my head. I watched thinking how many fucking games are there, how many tests, who are they supposed to care about, what the fuck is going on? Oh a flashback! Alright I get it now they are all liars, cheaters and thugs that need to play games, pass tests and care about some dying guy.

They need to care about Shawnee Smith and the Jigsaw guy but more about the Jigsaw guy than Shawnee cause she’s a murderer. Donny Walhburg is a bad cop and not as cute as his brother. Westley is a cheater. The guy who can talk to dead people from Lost loses the top of his head. And Rodger Murtaugh is an awesome narrator.

Don’t look into peepholes. Follow the rules even when you don’t know what they are. Don’t crawl into big old ovens. Don’t stick your hands in boxes suspended from ceilings. Don’t do drugs. Don’t murder anyone.

So in the end, its all about the Jigsaw guy because he knows where everyone still alive is being kept. Oh and they all have a limited amount of air that may or may not have poisonous gas in it.

I think. I’ll have to watch these again to get better perspective, who knows when that will be.

Now my head hurts.

I liked Zombieland. It was exactly what I thought and everyone said it is. I want to have a Ghostbuster’s roleplay orgy with Bill Murry, Woody Harrelson and Emma Stone. The curly haired Michael Cera annoyed me so I will not include him or let him watch.

I’ve had CumTenTimesDaily!! in my free chat several times since the sircumalot post. When I’m in a private pay chat and I see him pop on I want to leave and go into the free chat just to talk to him. He says some of the most…romantic things.

The following excerpt is from my chat with him and a few others last night. I didn’t really edit it much and was surprised by the very small amount of typos. I figure this guy is typing one handed. I left a few others in too just so you can get an idea of what I go through every night.

Welcome to your Free Text Chat Room, Alixxxxx!
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : hello again
cum4u100(p) : Hi Alix how are you sweetie
Alixxxxx : im good how are you
Alixxxxx : hey, king of spooge, i’ve missed you!
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : LOL! i love you alix!
cum4u100(p) : im doing good
cum4u100(p) : My name is Tom from Washington, where are you from
Alixxxxx : im from the midwest
Alixxxxx : nice to meet you tom from washington
cum4u100(p) : cool, I grew up in Illinois
Alixxxxx : so did i!
cum4u100(p) : lol, your kidding right, I grew up in Lombard and then moved to McHenry after High School
Alixxxxx : so spunk god tell me how many times you did it today
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : all sexy horny people are in the midwest
Alixxxxx : are you?
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : yes
Alixxxxx : where? im suprised i havent been hit with your jizz
Alixxxxx : i grew up around mchenry
cum4u100(p) : thats so cool, small world
Alixxxxx : its boring there
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i can make a jizz shower for you baby
Alixxxxx : yes! thats what i want for xmas
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : LOL
Alixxxxx : just watch out for my eyes
Dazzal54(f) : hi ali
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : how about a jizz pool to swim in
Alixxxxx : as long as its heated
Alixxxxx : hello dazzal
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i could cum like a river for you baby
Alixxxxx : that would take forever for me to drink
Dazzal54(f) : i got my dcick out for you babe
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : but you would still enjoy it right
Alixxxxx : hold on boys
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : my dick is soooooo hard and horny baby
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : im ready to send a jizz shower your way
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : brb sexy baby
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) has left the chat.

After the spooge king left I had another guest who made me laugh. I really can’t get the humiliation thing right. I giggle and and blush when I have to tell some dude his cock is too small. From what I gather by talking to these men, most were victims of locker room teasing during puberty. When I went through puberty, everything made me horny. Being teased on a daily basis while their cocks were growing must have turned them on. I actually think its quite normal. I’ve also learned many experienced some homosexual encounter with the school jocks who would berate them in public but ask to get their dick sucked in private. This is what I tell people when they ask me why anyone would want to be humiliated for having such a small penis. But I’m not an expert.

Besides all that, what he says near the end cracked me up. What’s better is I don’t think he meant to insult me.

tnyprk(f) : Good evening.
[private] To tnyprk(f) : hello
tnyprk(f) : How are you this evening?
tnyprk(f) : I was admiring your wonderful photographs.
[private] To tnyprk(f) : thank you
[private] To tnyprk(f) : im good this evening how are you
tnyprk(f) : I am OK.
tnyprk(f) : Your face is quite beautiful and your body looks delicious.
[private] To tnyprk(f) : im very curvy and soft
tnyprk(f) : Too bad I could not satisfy you for I am an older male with a tiny endowment.
Alixxxxx : im back
tnyprk(f) : Was not sure if you were interested earlier.
[private] To tnyprk(f) : sorry i had a guest
tnyprk(f) : Never a need to apologize to me.
tnyprk(f) : I enjoy being ordered to wait.
[private] To tnyprk(f) : i noticed
[private] To tnyprk(f) : so you like being humiliated
tnyprk(f) : That I like a lot.
tnyprk(f) : Very much so. Very tiny endowment.
[private] To tnyprk(f) : well, my persona is pretty giggly and goofy, i have lots of guys ask me to humiliate them and i am not sure i can do it well
[private] To tnyprk(f) : i appreciate your request
[private] To tnyprk(f) : it fascinates me
tnyprk(f) : Ok then. If you ever want to try with me please send me a message.
[private] To tnyprk(f) : i usually really love the penis no matter what size
[private] To tnyprk(f) : i wish i could help you
tnyprk(f) : I wish you could lick your ass.
[private] To tnyprk(f) : my cat can and i do get jealous
tnyprk(f) : Sorry if I was too blunt.
[private] To tnyprk(f) : well it was a weird statement
[private] To tnyprk(f) : i know girls that can
tnyprk(f) : Their own?
[private] To tnyprk(f) : yeah they are double jointed or something
[private] To tnyprk(f) : you’d be surprised who you meet while working in the adult industry
tnyprk(f) : Like I said send me a message if you change your mind.
tnyprk(f) : You are extremely cute.
tnyprk(f) has left the chat.

I think he meant he wished he could lick my ass. From now on when someone says they wish they could help me, I’m coming back with “I wish you could lick your ass”.

I just found out I was on the main page of freeones today. I didn’t check my email all day so I missed this. But it might still be up for a while. If not, you can see what they linked to here. This was a wonderfully fun video to do and I’m excited to see my favorite red undies. Also, it features one of my favorite co-stars.

Of course I can’t watch the clips because my computer is stupid. It’s not me it’s my computer. I don’t really care, I kind of cringe when I see myself. I thought I’d always want to watch myself but I don’t at all. I’m one of those people that freaks out when I see myself so I just don’t watch anything I’ve done at all. This does not mean I have an image problem or think I’m ugly, I’m just embarrassed to see myself in the throws of ecstasy. Besides it’s not for me its for you. Have fun with it.

Tomorrow, the 8th of October, I am going to try to do my webcam show from a hot tub. If you want to see you can click on the picture of me holding my tits on the right. Or try this.

It should be interesting and I’m not sure how long I can stay in the water, but it would be really fun to splash around for you. Plus my boobs float. It’s a must see.

And finally, a few of my friends from college found me on facebook and are now posting all these pictures of me from 1….a log time ago. So if you want to see them add me on facebook.

Wow two posts in one day! Well I didn’t sleep which sometimes happens when I am broke and worried about how to buy cigarettes. No I haven’t quit!

I am proud to announce that I am finally up on MrSkin for the LBP movie Ski Wolf. Remember that? What? No! Well here’s a picture:

or two:

Also, the video I did and blogged about a month ago is up at Sensational. I hope most of you have already seen it but if you haven’t and have been waiting, you can now.

Its time for another ImLive chat room post. This guy has probably been in my free chat area every week for a few months. When he first graced me with his spunk I thought he wanted to pay for a chat. I talked to him for a while wondering if he would go to the pay chat but he never did. He did go on and on about how much he loved and wanted to come. Descriptions of where, how and how much come he would administer on me would follow. I sometimes let him just talk to himself about it. He never PMs me so everyone can see what he is writing and they all either love him or hate him. I personally love him.

He shared a particularly entertaining spooge story last week which had some of my guests gagging. I forgot to copy it and was really mad at myself. They don’t save the chats on ImLive probably for this reason. I never give out real user names-but this is pretty close. Besides I have a feeling this guy would be flattered into cumming all over this blog 10 times!

Fortunately, I copied this one last night. It is equally entertaining. Read as he chronicles his mission with a Hitomi Tanaka porn. She’s quite something and I suggest you look her up.

Enjoy

Welcome to your Free Text Chat Room, Alixxxxx!
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : hello sexy baby
Alixxxxx : hey jizz master
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : hru sexy baby!!!!
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i have been jizzing like crazy, sexy baby
Alixxxxx : oh tell me more
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i have been horny horny horny horny horny baby
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : cant stop stroking my cock
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i am addicted to stroking and jizzing!!!!!!
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i was on a mission last night
Alixxxxx : what kind of mission
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : stroking my cock to see how much i could cum in a hour
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : it was quite entertaining
Alixxxxx : well tell me about it then
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i was watching porn and stroking my cock back and forth
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : and up and down
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : rolling my balls all over
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : my cock was sooooo big and tight
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i jizzed all over in about 5 minutes
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : but my cock was still insanely hard!!!!!!
Alixxxxx : what kind of porn were you watching to make you spooge so much?
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : an asian girl with 36JJ size tits!!!!!
Alixxxxx : yeah those asians are hot
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : she made me cum 3 times in 15 minutes!!!!!!
Alixxxxx : thats a record i think
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : her tits were incredibly HUGE
Alixxxxx : you should do porn
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : LOL
Alixxxxx : i think i know who you are talking about
Alixxxxx : were her tits a little lopsided
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : slightly
Alixxxxx : yeah ive seen that chick she is hot
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : looked very real though
Alixxxxx : i thought they were
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i think they are real!!!!
Alixxxxx : yeah you dont get that shape with a boob job
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : my cock exploded 7 times with in the hour for her
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : it was AMAZING!!!!!
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : have you seen her videos?
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i have a few of her videos
Alixxxxx : what her name
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : Hitomi Tanaka
Alixxxxx : yep thats her
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : sweet!!!!!
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : she has the most amazing asian boobs!!!!
Alixxxxx : when they hang down the look like bowling pins
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : LOL
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i know!!!
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : lol
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i love it though!!!!
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : that is about the time my cock EXPLODES for her!!!!
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : now, i will never think of bowling pins the same way!!
chromehors99(f) : thats sick
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i love when her hands get lost in her huge boobs
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : wouldn’t you love to be smothered by her HUGE 36JJ boobs
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : you and i should take her on
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : one Giant Boob for each
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : i hope her boobs keep growing Bigger and Bigger
CumTenTimesDaily!!(f) : brb

He never came back but I think he was all tuckered out. His poor little willy must have knocked him out. I can’t wait for his next appearance!

Alright I’m retracting the 8 inch requirement.

The shoot happened last Thursday. It was, um, fantastic. The guy fucked my brains out, literally! I was so stupid afterward that when he drove me home I forgot how to get there. When I realized this I got nervous and acted really dorky talking like an 8th grader.

Like, what kind of music do you listen to? Where do you like to hang, you know, after scho–I mean work? One time, I had sex on the roof of that liquor store! Isn’t that cool? (Giggle, snort, giggle)

I lost my cool porno persona due to having a hot guy drive me home, getting banged into oblivion and forgetting how crappy Chicago traffic is. Poor hunk was tired too. Guys do get tired after sex and girls well, we jump up and want to discuss scientific theories or in my case, weird places I’ve fucked. He was really nice too and I suppose I swooned a bit.

The above 8inch retraction is in no way an indicator that my co-star was less than 8. He was more like 11inches and thick like an overstuffed sausage. I can fit quite a bit of hard cock into my mouth but I was no where near close to getting this beautiful piece of man meat all the way down. It’s a challenge I hope to explore more.

This was the kind of cock that makes me wish penis’ were detachable. Unlike King Missile, I would never forget where it was. If I had a regular job I would bring it in for show and tell. I would have it next to me on the couch and watch sad movies and we would cry and hug at the end. I would buy it pretty rings in platinum and the finest latex with vibrating attachments. It would be safe and warm with(in) me at night. I would love it always forever and ever. Occasionally I would let the man attach it and fuck me too.

Only in my dreams…..

There is a huge lack of male talent to do boy girl scenes right now. The guy I was supposed to work with today flaked out. We haven’t heard from him so he must be dead. The short notice isn’t helping my cause at all. So I’m asking for any willing partners to do a video with me.

There are a few requirements:

You must have at least 8 inches and substantial width. Nothing over 10 inches please. It’s necessary to be in pretty good shape. Looks aren’t as important to producers but it makes it a lot easier on the girls. You need to be able to shoot your load. If it just seeps out you are a poor shooter and not needed. And importantly, you need to be professional. I am not your personal sex toy for this. Making video’s isn’t what you might think it is.

Email me: alix@wecouldbenaked.com

I need someone pretty quick so if you are in Chicago or near it, you can have sex, on camera, with me soon!

It’s clear that I’m doing this whole video thing wrong.

Pretty Ricky

Sometime in the 80’s, I remember the junior high boys laughing about reports of Richard Gere sticking gerbils up his butt. I believed it of course, but I believed everything back then. Visualizing cute little gerbils biting the inside of Gere’s butt hole freaked me out. I also wondered how they could breathe. The thought of them covered in shit didn’t come until further contemplation followed by vomit. Imagining that they probably died made me angry and birthed my overwhelming hate for Richard Gere. Coming to the realization that this was an urban legend and that Gere most likely wouldn’t have to resort to gerbils (he could probably get a small woman to willingly climb inside his asshole if he wanted), only made him somewhat tolerable. But I still had the icky image in my head and came to the conclusion that Gere was creepy and most likely had really nasty breath.

A friend used to tell stories about having to rush her boyfriend to the emergency room because she lodged a dildo up his ass and couldn’t get it out. We never tired of that story and cringed while taking shots of vodka. I believed her. I still do. I’ve stuck many a dildo up human male ass and luckily none got stuck. I do wonder how that happened. I’ve never shoved the whole dildo into an asshole. The friend’s boyfriend must have wanted to see if she could get it into his large intestine. It must have felt good (at first? throughout? until it got stuck?).  She was a bit sadistic, but he was a 200 pound black man and she was maybe 150lbs, white and southern. I like to think the southern in her played a big part.

Many of my friends, mostly male but a few female, talk of the glorious dumps they have had in the past and how they wish every dump could be the same. I don’t even like to think about dumping. Being in this business I have heard about fecal joys during sex, chocolate gifts and hot carls on heaving chests. I just assume those people have no aversion to the stink or the, ugh, taste. But I like to keep an open mind and if I have to see it I want to be behind three panes of protective glass wearing a hazmat suit and a gas mask infused with lavender flowers. Then I think it could be somewhat pleasant and funny to watch.

A few years back, I dated a director in training/screenplay writer. He wrote and I cleaned it up which usually meant an entire re-write. We met up with an ex-enforcer of the mob who wanted to be the next Nicholas Pilleggi. Our strong arm employed us to write a screen play about John Wayne Gacy. He would get the funding by, I’m assuming, cutting off fingers and breaking knees. To Chicago, Gacy is one of our morbid celebrities. I know where he used to live because many boyfriends liked to drive by the old house site/grave site to show off that they grew up somewhat close to it (anywhere from 3 to 50 miles away). I have to admit I was impressed. It was only a horror movie in my head. I never saw any of the news reports or really even knew what he did. Until now. I read at least five books about this clown painting, boy torturing, psycho and had nightmares for years. I still do. Along with the books, our friendly ex-con had obtained police photos and reports of the crime scene, police excavation and Gacy tools of torture. What bothered me the most? The photo of the 18 inch dildo. It looked like it was three feet long and a foot thick. It scared me and when I saw the photos of the boys he used it on I cried. I had to drink a lot and do much needed cocaine to forget.

Nothing ever happened with the script, mostly because it was written on cocaine.

With that horror behind me, I can once again embrace my things-in-the-colon obsession. However much I like to lick assholes, finger them or dildo them, I’ve never been a fan of having my butt hole touched fingered or intruded. I get at least two requests a night on ImLive for anal even though it states in my profile that I don’t probe mine with anything. I’ll show it off and maybe touch it a little but nothing goes in. My webcam enthusiasts most likely don’t read my profile. Just seeing my boobs probably draws them in thinking with such a huge chest I must shove cucumbers in my anal cavity many times daily. I don’t even buy cucumbers.

My favorite request was to shove a 2 liter up my ass. I asked him how I was supposed to do this. And he said to oil it up. He never cautioned me to keep the cap on to prevent the open end from attaching itself to my colon wall with suction. I wondered how many shit covered Pepsi and Colt 45 bottles he had laying around his house. I refused and he whined. He asked me to use a banana and I told him I only eat those. “not even a cucumber? Please? Pretty please” No I said. “Fuck you cunt!” was his reply. I wonder if he fantasizes about being abducted by anal probing aliens?

I thought a 2 liter was impossible to shove up the rectum but I was wrong.

I read an article in Carnal Nation this morning and was able to satisfy my rectal infusion preoccupation for the rest of the year. Enjoy the links and remember to use tons of lube and keep the caps on the po(o)p bottles!

For some reason I couldn’t get on ImLive yesterday. That was scary. I thought I was in trouble again for giving out my FREE website address. This morning I checked and all is back to normal. Tonight I’ll be back on to greet all the virgins who want me to insult them.

Speaking of, these so called virgins are very rude! They curse at me when I refuse to insult them. I suppose virgins are allowed to curse but I think I would prefer my virgins to be a little more polite. Telling me I’m a fat cunt with big tits doesn’t really piss me off as much as it bores me.

I get a lot of webcams in my sessions. The majority of the time these guys aim the camera at their genitals. It’s either too dark or too hairy for me to see whats going on. When I first started, I mistook a penis for a thumb. I thought I was getting the thumbs up for being so cute. He wrote that I was cute and I just assumed. So I gave him the thumbs up too. Then he wrapped his hand around his thumb and I knew he just had a small bald dick that was curved and uncircumcised. I wasn’t too familiar with uncircumcised cocks. I laughed at myself and he of course thought I was laughing at him. He immediately left and went into my free chat and called me a bunch of names. I tried apologizing and telling him my mistake but that infuriated him more.

I was really new at the whole webcam thing. I had no idea that the picture would be so bad. I also had no clue that I would be getting so many cocks. ImLive is for exhibitionist men who want to see exhibitionist women. I have seen guys in front of cameras posed on their sides, hand supporting their heads, one leg up at an angle and grasping their cock. It’s the Teen Beat pose! I had posters of Rob Lowe, Kirk Cameron, Cory Haim and about 50 others all in that pose! Unfortunately my teen dreams were clothed and my cammed suitors were not.

I prefer to start with the face and eventually move down to the penis. Its common knowledge that I like to see a guy come and its an added bonus to a session. But beginning at the penis isn’t all that exciting as I suppose these dudes think it is.

A few days ago I had a guy in the midst of jerking off and frantically saying something over and over again. I think he was saying: “fuck those big titties, oh yeah, oh yeah, fuck those big titties”. I stared at him for a bit trying not to laugh. All he could see was my head and my cleavage. I didn’t show him my “titties”. It was a frenzied hand job slick with lube. He was panting and it looked like he was jumping up and down. It might have been hot with an intro but I don’t think these guys are too interested in what I have to say nor do they want me to see their faces.

When I immediately see a penis on a webcam I usually think two things: this guy is totally turned on by the thought of me seeing his thing and this guy thinks I’m disposable. The latter sounds sad but it’s not really. I usually hang up on them immediately.

I talk to people in free chat. I try to get to know them and joke around. It seems to make them respect me more and want to actually spend money on me. It isn’t recommended that we talk in free chat except to encourage sales. But I do it anyway. I’ll know what they like and what to expect.

Then of course, there is the perfect customer who spends at least 30 minutes with me and lets me decide if and when I get naked and if and when I masturbate. And my regulars always show me their faces if they have cams. They’re all gorgeous no matter what they think of themselves. And they have beautiful cocks!

I know some of you think I should ignore this guy, but I find it amusing to point out his stupidity. I mean, if you’re going to insult me at least do it with the proper vocabulary.

Comment from Chronic Master Bater:

You all GOT to be FUCKING KIDDING ME!!! Do any of you think she’d actually reply? Here??
The whole idea behind blog (especially ones like these) is for random idiots to SATISFY THEIR LATENT EGOS (”Look at me, mommy, I got a blog! Strangers actually read what I have to say!,)get their little bullshit 15 minutes and to get some kind of cyber-fame and dare I say, “cult following”.
Look at her links, especially her blog links! I’d still fuck this broad, but I think her ego along with anyone out there 1)posting, 2)blogging, or 3)otherwise milking every last drop of their 15 minutes of fame, won’t allow her to actually respond her OR to ANY type of personal contact.
What an egotistical HYPOCRITE!
This broad probably predictably still won’t post a reply here. Let’s play the wait and see game…..

I have great love for Chronic Master Bater! His stupidity is fantastic! He just can’t help but dig himself into a hole. I think his brain is seeping out of his penis due to his perpetual masturbation.

First, why would anyone want to play ” the wait and see game”? A game is supposed to be fun. If he wants to sit on his ass staring at my blog waiting for my response and masturbating to his imaginary genius, he can go right ahead.

Next: Latent definition:
Present but not visible, apparent, or actualized; existing as potential: latent ability.
Existing in  unconscious or dormant form but potentially able to achieve expression: a latent emotion.

The Master Bater’s assumption contradicts his claim that I am seeking fame. If bloggers had latent egos they wouldn’t blog. If I had a latent ego I wouldn’t post naked pictures. To satisfy my latent ego I think I would have to ignore it. However, my ego wouldn’t know it was being ignored because its latent. Therefore you can not satisfy a latent ego. Moreover, its impossible to have a latent ego.

It’s probably safe to say that this guy was too busy masturbating to get a high school diploma.

More: Since I am actually posting his comment and replying to it proves that he can’t predict shit. I spent every day 12 hours a day answering emails and comments for three years. I took a break recently and didn’t answer comments or emails. It just got to be too much. I doubt I’ll ever get back to answering like I used to but I am answering more now. This proves that I have personal relationships with people who read my blog.

I’m not even going to dive into his inability to use proper punctuation.

And “broad”? What is he 70 years old? Who uses “broad” anymore?

Finally, I doubt this guy would fuck me. I look nothing like the palm of his hand. And if that didn’t matter I doubt he could handle me.

This is the perfect example of someone who should really keep their mouth shut.

Blog comment from:

Chronic Master Bater
“I love how she can’t even post her replies here……
As for not fucking “fans”…..more egotism and hypocrisy……
I wouldn’t be surprised that she “took care of those guys” off-camera, isn’t that what a good whore does? I was a little surprised, because at first glance I had thought she meant she got some people to kick those BB guy’s asses…. Yeah, right.
But I digress, I love whores too!!!!
What I hate, and can NOT stand is a whore who acts (in public especially) like she’s NOT a whore……..Come on now, let’s cut the bullshit, people!
Maybe due to some kind of twisted logical imbalance in her brain, she thinks she’s too good to fuck “fans” or that it’s somehow “beneath her”…..
Let’s see her reply to this….If she dares……
Hahahahaha…….Boyfriend, schmoyfriend……What’s that got to do with anything since she strips in front of a webcam and hires herself out for print and video….?
Just an example of her sexual hypocrisy……You people really are stupid…..”

Chronic masturbating fucks up your spunk, I would be careful if I were you.

Oh man! So I’m a whore, who cares? I have never said I wasn’t a whore. As for prostitution, I fully support it and have no problem with anyone doing it. I, unfortunately don’t think I could mentally handle being a prostitute or an escort.

On a daily basis, I get emails asking me what my rates per hour are or if I am for hire. It makes sense that I would write about how I don’t escort. I considered it, mostly for the money and writing material, but I was too scared to actually do it. I guess I can blame that on the twisted logical imbalance in my brain. Saying that the twisted logical imbalance in my brain makes me think I’m too good to fuck fans doesn’t really apply to me, because I do fuck fans, just not for money. What I said was I don’t do videos with fans.

Wait, “twisted logical imbalance” doesn’t really make sense to me. Does it mean my twisted imbalance is logical? It is better to say my logic is twisted. Logical is an adjective. Basically this chicken choker is saying that my imbalance is logically twisted which makes no sense or he thinks I‘m smart for logically twisting my imbalance. I guess the weasel wacker is a mental midget who likes adjectives.

My brain hurts now.

I’m also not sure that having twisted logic is that bad. And most people are unbalanced. I guess this nut buster thinks he isn’t unbalanced and his logic is straight or even (the opposite of twisted). While I could say that it must be nice to have mental superiority over most of the population, I don’t think that’s the case since he’s incapable of using adjectives properly. But if he is mentally superior, it’s a wonder that he can relate to anyone.

The fact that I fuck fans and admit it completely disproves this hand job’s hypocrisy argument. I’m pretty honest in this blog and I don‘t remember ever saying I was too good to escort. Calling me a hypocrite only means he didn’t take the time to read more than the black bachelor post which was a satirical retort toward the rumors that surround the video. Including the claims that I have a boyfriend. The smart people understand that.

Why this walking wankathon bothers to make any criticisms is beyond me. It seems like a waste of time. What’s the point? Does he think I will pull my blog and sulk in the corner with my twisted logical imbalance? And what’s the purpose of saying “you guys are stupid”? Is he trying to spread his untwisted logic to my readers or insult them? Who knows? What I do know is that most likely this whore loving narcissistic hose choker will have another insulting comment for me after this.

What’s your other email address besides this one?”

Me: You know, I have a little prepared speech I tell my suitor when he wants more than I’d like to give him. Gee, blank, I had a really nice…

So what do you think about visiting? I’d love to give you a good pounding and spray my cum all over your face…….

You don’t deserve my fucking speech.

This email made my clit shrink in horror. The stud emailed me with this same message five times. I returned the email saying I wasn’t an escort and didn’t think I would be in New York any time soon. He replied saying he wasn’t a fan he just wanted to fuck me. This isn’t the way to go about it. I’m confused as to why he thinks I would go for this. I guess he just thinks I’m like the character I play in the Black Bachelor video.

At least he knows what he wants.